A stranger who rapes a child and runs away is a dangerous person who must be caught but he/she is not grooming a child.
child sexual abuse in the home, schools, church, care homes and clubs is also child grooming and it maybe the grooming of a child does longer lasting psychological harm than the actual rape. It must be that almost the first thing a groomed child learns is to want to please his/her attacker because the alternative maybe very painful even fatal and the abuse will happen anyway.
The experiences of Darren and Nick were told on Exaro News. Each approached Exaro and explained their abuse to the reporters who sent them to the police and then published their stories on their website. The same applies to Esther.
Exaro News should have done their own research made a full investigation into the background and previous record of Darren, Nick and Esther, had they done so it would mean that two thorough investigations had taken place and that would give police and public more confidence in what was reported.
I don’t know if Exaro did investigate these survivors of child sexual abuse there are allegations that they did not and if that is true it is a serious lapse of professional standards but it does not in itself prevent or infringe the law.
The police are another matter the evidence they need is far more stringent than that required by journalists who for example can accept hearsay and probability. The police can’t do that they need corroboration , actual evidence that can be put before a court and if as so often happens in child sexual abuse cases they don’t get it the allegations will not even get as far as criminal charges.
Survivors of child sexual abuse are vulnerable people those who suffered years of abuse were also forcefully trained to please their abusers.
Its unfair and wrong to call a victim of child sexual abuse a fantasist and its wrong to say Exaro shouldn’t have published the allegations. Exaro are the very reason so much attention is now being given to child sexual abuse and its many victims.
In many ways for survivors of child grooming and child abuse the investigation into an allegation must be as bad and maybe worse than the abuse itself. Each occasion must be relived and explained to the police and media in great detail.
It must take survivors on a journey in time and in that journey they must relive pain and humiliation, maybe they also re experience the original grooming method and the need to avoid punishment by pleasing their abuser
It could be anyone in a position of authority who reopens unhealed wounds also reopens untreated grooming.I’m not sure how much is known about the long terms affect of child grooming. It seems obvious to me that its a form of among other things brain washing. It therefore surely follows that whilst some may recover fully from being groomed others will deeply buried in locked down memory carry the fear and the need to obey and please their abuser.
I may return to this subject but all I want to do for now is highlight something for myself that probably everyone already knows and recognises. I hope Darren, Nick, Esther and all victims of abuse find healing, justice, peace and contentment in their lives.
Today we learned Operation Midland is to close with no charges being brought against Harvey Proctor or any VIP paedophiles. Its not unexpected its confirmation of how difficult it is to prove older cases of child sexual abuse.
Some have called Nick and others fantasists but if some victims of child sexual abuse do fantasize what makes them stretch the truth into fantasy because surely there would have to be a trigger, does something within them react to questioning and try to please the authority of the questioner/s because if so its something the police and counselors should be concerned about.
Its unfair and wrong to jump to conclusions about victims of child sexual abuse, child grooming is as far as I know a rarely looked at element of abuse but to the child it maybe the most wounding, long lasting and invisible scar they have to live with and try to overcome.
I’ve been reading about other opinions of Operation Midland I’m reluctant to do a new post because it would be even more repetitive than this one has become but I would like people to consider what they read in other blogs and tweets and what is described therein.
Its not Munchhausen by Proxy and its not Stockholm Syndrome and nor is it straightforward fantasy. It seems to me to be something as yet unlabeled not because the experts don’t know about it I think they do and I think some of the establishment rely on it to discredit some victims and/or witnesses.
Its the reaction of a groomed child attempting to please his/her abuser because grooming is about more than tying someone down and forcing them to do something, its about inflicting different degrees and kinds of violence to obtain the desired result. Perhaps the majority of victims of long term child sexual grooming and child sexual abuse recover in their own way when the grooming ends but very likely not all can and so the core of the grooming stays within vulnerable to further attack when pressured by someone seen as a figure of authority and/or power over them